Invocation to a Noisy Audience

In the last two days I experienced what I believe are the rudest sets of audience members I have ever performed for in 18 years of doing shows.

This is not to say that every single audience member was rude, and I don't know if there was a full moon out that night or some planets were oddly aligned, but I was flabbergasted.

Last night, we had to graciously deal with a talkative audience. As actors you get used to the normal noises of causes, seat-shuffling, and sniffs (although, the smaller the house, the more aggravating it can be). But some member's last night thought it was ok to have full-on conversations to the point where other audience members were shushing them. To add insult to injury, a cell phone goes off (this has happened before but the offender has silenced the errant cellie immediately). And the audience member answers her phone and proceeds to have a conversation to the horror of three actors onstage and other audience members who are up in arms and tell her to shut up and get out.

This continued through the end of the show.

Today, another cell phone went off and it kept ringing. Although it was not answered, the offender just let it keep ringing and ringing.

What is unfortunate is that we can't stop the action onstage and both times the audience missed vital bits of information.

I imagine in larger Broadway houses that actors onstage don't often hear much (especially in musicals). I know I have been thoroughly annoyed by other audience members who talk and noisily open their candy when I just want to enjoy the show.

And really...who actually thinks opening cellophane slowly makes less noise??? Bring along a ziplock back with unwrapped candies and have at it.

One night, two guests in the front row actually opened a bag of potato chips and began sharing it. And the stage is aboutt two feet from the front row. Another night, a young teen starting eating gummi bears.

We are not celluloid. We CAN hear and see you.

It angers me that we respect audiences enough to show up and put our heart out there to entertain them for two hours and some people lack the basic common sense of turning off phones, not talking, and not being a distraction when you are directly in the front row. Some actually DO believe we are a movie theatre. I do not get it.

On a more positive note, we are being taped by PBS on Monday for a September broadcast. I am not nervous...yet...have not even thought about it. I AM looking forward to reuniting with two original cast members for the taping and wonder if the old rhythms and motions will come back.

As for what's next...I dunno.

My big audition this past week went REALLY well. But, as usual, I doubt anything will come of it.