Sevan Greene ~ Actor/Singer ~ NYC

Extra! Extra! Hey Look at the Headlines...

2008-08-15T21:39:00.000-07:00

The reviews are in and the show is a hit. People recognize it for what it is and are not taking it seriously by trying to put it on some comparative level to a serious musical theatre book show. It's a fun silly show that pokes fun and is pure satire which is something missing from the stage.

We have packed three performances, with two more to go (and possibly more, but can't say much about that now). The audiences have loved it and I look forward to doing the show whenever I can.

New York Post

Time Out

Theatremania

Backstage

The Advocate

Another Openin', Another Show

2008-08-03T09:21:00.000-07:00

Well, before I knew it, another show I was cast in is nearing the end of it's rehearsal process and we open on Saturday.

Rehearsals are going well, the cast is hilarious, the material, is hilarious, and the show promises to be, well, hilarious.

Esper classes ended last week, and I was asked to continue on into the 2-year program, so now I have a somewhat major decision to make as I need to figure out if I can financially afford the program and if it is going to interfere with other shows and Betrayed (which is still breathing and seeking new life in different venues which all promise to be amazing but none of which I can talk about as nothing is really that set).

It's hard to justify spending the money on the classes for only one reason - my booking a job is not going to be dependent on those classes. Yes, the training helps and will make me an even better actor, but the truth is that I am going to get cast based first on what I look like and if that fits the character and second if I can act the part. That probably does not make any sense outside of my own head.

Well then....

2008-07-18T19:08:00.000-07:00

I sheepishly return to a new post, after the previous emotional rant, having been called a couple of days ago with the offer to do the show I had though I bombed the audition for.

For the second year in a row I will be performing in the NYC Fringe Festival, which I am quite happy about. I am even more please because of the show. Brace yourselves...

Perez Hilton Saves the Universe! (or at Least the Greater Los Angeles Area) The Musical

Oh, I jest not. Now, on first glance you might think this wildly ridiculous and out of left field. And it kind of is. But the script is funny and it's a total satire. I think it has the makings of a really good show. And, come on, it's Perez Hilton. I admit it. I read his blog. It's fun. It doesn't take itself seriously, and neither does he. It totally feeds into the gossip mongering everyone loves. We could get on a soapbox about it or laugh our asses off silly.

Besides, it's a different direction and change of temperature from Betrayed, so it will be fun to do something that is a complete 180 from my role in that show. And the role is a first for me. And that is all I will say so as to surprise those of you who come to see the show.

I am even more excited because of people attached to the cast which I can't really list as I don't think it is official. But there is a partial cast list on the site.

Classes at Esper are winding down, just as I am getting into the groove of things. It's been informative, educational and eye-opening and I am now wrestling with the decision of going into the 2-year program. The only cons are time commitment and money. Moreso the latter. I love being poked and prodded and forced to do things I only relegate to letting loose with onstage, but I am finding that the work I am doing in the classroom is a slap on the wrist for all the stupid things I do (or don't) in rehearsals. Mainly, holding back out of some inane fear (and really, aren't most actors' fears - outside of finances - inane?).

So if nothing else, it has given me a healthier approach to entering a rehearsal room and playing more and having fun and forgetting about my comfort zone.

Either that will happen or I'll end up curled into the fetal position in a corner singing "Nothing's Gonna Harm Me" [sic].

What a Feeling....

2008-07-12T11:03:00.000-07:00

There are days when the emotional stress/turmoil of being an actor can way too heavily, especially when it comes off of something so seemingly simple.

There are very few times when I get so excited about an audition for a show that I get the sweats and the twitters. I usually go in with an open mind to have fun and do my best and not worry about having to get the job or lose out on it. I just want to be in the room and have a moment and hope that my work and presence are what the casting and creative team are looking for. To get crazy and worked up as if my life depended on it is moot for me only insomuch as it is not something I can really control. This is not to say that I don't want to book the jobs I go in for because I do. I don't go to auditions JUST to have fun. The ultimate goal is to get the role. But since I don't control decisions I can only influence them with the work I present.

BUT once in a while I do get rabid about wanting to do a project I feel very strongly about. Betrayed was one of them and even though I felt I had bombed the callback, I was fortunate enough to be cast.

Yesterday was another of those moments, but one I do not think is going to end in my being cast because I felt like a complete and utter dweeby neophyte in the room. I wasn't really nervous and I wasn't really calm, and I could blame my uneasiness on 3 hours of a Meisner class wherein I lost my shit and was rattled, but that would be making excuses.

This show...I REALLY want. And some people think I am stupid for that because they see the show as fluffy and too screwball-y, and at first glance, sure, I can understand that. But the show is witty, smart, hilarious and totally pokes fun at people, celebrities and media-obsessed people. And because I am such a pop-culture enthusiast and am always amazed by the inane things people get obsessed with, I want to do the show. The part is silly and fun (and a musical one to boot) and one I know I could do in my sleep.

But I somehow managed to screw up one note in my song (an easy one that I could also do in my sleep with strep throat) and that was the death knell. I didn't think the scene I read went all that bad, but I didn't think it landed as hard as I wanted it to.

After it was done, I went out to sit in the hallway and just stayed there for a bit because I wanted to kick myself in the head.

Now, I could be beating myself up over nothing, but this one, I want. Badly. Not only because of the people involved (from cast to creative), but also because of the opportunity to do something so wildly different and fun. I have been in a daze for the last 48 hours doing what no actor should ever do: replaying the audition in my head and analyzing what went wrong and why. This, my friends, is no good for the actor's psyche.

It is also one of those moments where my mantra of "Whatever is meant to be will be," is taking a huge backseat to my "You are such a moron. How could you screw that up?" mantra.

It's depressing. I can only hope that somehow, I managed to do something that caught their eye (positively) and that I am just beating myself up for no reason. The universal actor's trail is lined with stories by celebrities and those in the upper echelons who have lost out on amazing roles in great shows, and something always comes along to soothe that. But right now, that is providing zero comfort for me.

I need to be slapped.

Climbing Uphill

2008-06-26T20:08:00.001-07:00

Today....sucked.

Thank you.

Today was a red letter day for sucking at auditions. I bombed three of them. I was so out of it.

However, today did teach me that I am no longer going to schedule auditions back to back with less than one hour in between each one because it does not help me. Especially when I am dressed up, but am running up and down streets and across avenues in the summer heat/humidity with random showers popping up here and there.

Had an audition at 10:10. Got there at 9:50. No one was there. Odd.
10:19 rolled around. My next audition was at 10:55 9 blocks down and two avenues east. Thankfully, the monitor showed up, and I asked to come back later.

No problem. Right?

I get to the second audition, which lasted all of 10 seconds and think that I royally screwed myself. I must have some mental block with TV/Film auditions. I either don't get it or am just confused as to what to do. I am never in a room long enough to figure it out because those auditions just ZIP by.

I get back to the first audition. The accompanist is not there yet. I have another audition at 12:35 18 blocks uptown and one avenue west. I ask to come back later.

I get to the third audition with plenty of time. I think I nail it but I have no idea because I think my face started twitching. So for all I know, I came across like a stroke victim.

I rush back to the first audition and get seen. I think, but am not sure, that I sang the first half of my song in a completely different key. I know the second half was spot on. But somehow, the first part felt completely wrong. Now for someone who has relative pitch, it is somewhat difficult to catch me off key or off note. But somehow my brain left me.

Then, and a lesson for all those who might read this, I get asked for a monologue on the spot. Thank GOD I have three that I have memorized and keep in my back pocket at all times. I start the monologue and realize four words into it that I may very well not even remember it since the last time I did it was about 10 months ago. I start panicking internally and manage to pull out all the words. However, I think I came across like a nutjob.

You know that is your song and monologue are funny and no one in the room laughs that you are doing something VERY wrong.

And so I came home, wallowed for a little bit, and just moved on...as best as I could. Of all the auditions I have had in the last year and four months, this is probably the third time I have felt like I bombed an audition. Of course, being an anal perfectionist, this does not sit well with me, but I gotta learn somehow.

A Weekend in the Country

2008-06-21T16:44:00.000-07:00

I am back from workshopping Food for Fadwa with the NYTW at Vassar College in Poughkeepsie this week.

It was a long week as I had to travel back for a callback and class, having left the morning after Betrayed closed, and then keep my wits about me. Good thing I was out in the country with nature all around me. Felt good to be cut off from my computer to just do nothing by work on a play.

I am however firmly glad I never stayed in a dorm in college. I don't see how collegiates can eat the food day in and day out for four years. By the second day I was ready to lose my mind.

The show went really well and was received with glowing, positive remarks. I got to work with an amazing cast and with and for an amazing actress/writer who I have come to admirer rather quickly and very fondly.

And now....I am back to focusing on class, auditions, and trying for the next job. I should treat myself to a break, but the fear of stopping and then never starting back up again is too strong. Gotta keep the train moving.

When You're Racing with the Clock

2008-06-17T21:24:00.000-07:00

Just a quick update as I am on a tight schedule this week.

Betrayed closed this past Sunday and while I feel this abysmal emptiness, I don't really have time to feed it because I left the following morning to work on Lameece Issaq's play Food for Fadwa for The New York Theatre Workshop.

No rest for the weary.

The play is amazing. The cast is amazing. I am exhausted and don't care.

More by the end of the week when I get done and get some time to breathe.

Until then...go go go!

Invocation to a Noisy Audience

2008-05-31T20:18:00.000-07:00

In the last two days I experienced what I believe are the rudest sets of audience members I have ever performed for in 18 years of doing shows.

This is not to say that every single audience member was rude, and I don't know if there was a full moon out that night or some planets were oddly aligned, but I was flabbergasted.

Last night, we had to graciously deal with a talkative audience. As actors you get used to the normal noises of causes, seat-shuffling, and sniffs (although, the smaller the house, the more aggravating it can be). But some member's last night thought it was ok to have full-on conversations to the point where other audience members were shushing them. To add insult to injury, a cell phone goes off (this has happened before but the offender has silenced the errant cellie immediately). And the audience member answers her phone and proceeds to have a conversation to the horror of three actors onstage and other audience members who are up in arms and tell her to shut up and get out.

This continued through the end of the show.

Today, another cell phone went off and it kept ringing. Although it was not answered, the offender just let it keep ringing and ringing.

What is unfortunate is that we can't stop the action onstage and both times the audience missed vital bits of information.

I imagine in larger Broadway houses that actors onstage don't often hear much (especially in musicals). I know I have been thoroughly annoyed by other audience members who talk and noisily open their candy when I just want to enjoy the show.

And really...who actually thinks opening cellophane slowly makes less noise??? Bring along a ziplock back with unwrapped candies and have at it.

One night, two guests in the front row actually opened a bag of potato chips and began sharing it. And the stage is aboutt two feet from the front row. Another night, a young teen starting eating gummi bears.

We are not celluloid. We CAN hear and see you.

It angers me that we respect audiences enough to show up and put our heart out there to entertain them for two hours and some people lack the basic common sense of turning off phones, not talking, and not being a distraction when you are directly in the front row. Some actually DO believe we are a movie theatre. I do not get it.

On a more positive note, we are being taped by PBS on Monday for a September broadcast. I am not nervous...yet...have not even thought about it. I AM looking forward to reuniting with two original cast members for the taping and wonder if the old rhythms and motions will come back.

As for what's next...I dunno.

My big audition this past week went REALLY well. But, as usual, I doubt anything will come of it.

We're Opening Doors...

2008-05-24T09:08:00.000-07:00

Well, some of life's insanity has taken a vacation and after being sidelined for three weeks with a horrible cold/virus/plague, I am finally feeling better and thus ready to tackle some small projects left undone.

Fixed the wonky problems with the site and am almost done fixing this blog so it looks like the rest of the site.

We got out closing notice at Betrayed and our now closing June 16. Not for any financial or audience size reason. We have extended, thankfully, beyond any date that anyone foresaw, but actors' previous projects are now creeping up and the logistics of trying to find and rehearse replacements was going to be a nightmare, so we are shutting the doors...for now. Who knows what will happen with the show as the response is still positive and fresh. PBS is taping the show on June 2 for broadcast (not sure when it will appear on TV). And there are other plans in the works that will hopefully come to fruition.

I am proud of myself for making every single show even when I thought I was going to die from exhaustion or illness. This is by far the longest run I have ever sustained or had the opportunity to sustain so I feel like after the last 3 weeks of double duty and sick (with bronchial pneumonia first and then a sinus infection married to pharyngitis....nice) I can handle anything. It's been rough some night, but I have found that I don't get bored (impatient, sometimes, yes) and am driven by professional obligation and passion. And a paycheck....yes...a paycheck, musn't forget that.

And thank god for Equity League health insurance to get me through the last couple of weeks.

After the show closes, who knows? I am starting classes with William Esper (the man himself) and am looking forward to tweaking and sharpening the tools in the drawer.

I have an amazing audition set for this coming week that could mean something huge if the cards fall right, but I am trying not to think about the situation in either the positive or the negative. Just want to go in, not fall on my face, do my job, and, hopefully, land the job. To say I am excited and nervous would be a massive understatement. This is probably the most rattled I have been since I got to New York (almost one year and 6 months ago).

Keep fingers crosses, candles lit, and prayers uttered.

Well, it's been a long day

2008-05-05T20:05:00.000-07:00

Doing two shows at once...a recipe for disaster. Although, not really, just a snack for exhaustion. But I still think it is a great learning experience. Rehearsing one show during the morning/afternoon, performing another at night. And then performing two shows at once.

Is it a wonder I don't drink.

But I am loving the creative staff of the second show and am enjoying the change of pace.

If only, I could stop getting sick, I would be fine.

Am called in to for a 29-hour AEA reading for an Armenian-focused play tomorrow. I am REALLY looking forward to this. Not only because I AM Armenian, but also because there are not that many works with Armenian themes and this one is right up my alley. It focuses on issues I am wrestling with at the moment in terms of cultural identity and finding answers to historical pasts and links.

And we were pleasantly surprised to learn at the end of the evening at the show that Betrayed won the Lortel Award for Outstanding Play. As if I was not proud enough of the show, now there is extra little feather in the cap. The show got its last extension to June 28 at which point I will feel a little lost at sea. Something is always just around the bend though. I have been so lucky and blessed to not stop working since I landed my first gig last March, so I am hoping the streak continues.

But...I need to get to bed for a 6:45 call...A.M. people.....A.M.

And, yes, I know the site is not fixed yet. Need a moment to breathe and I WILL finish it.

It's So Hard to Say Goodbye, Part 2

2008-04-13T15:13:00.000-07:00

Yes, I know...site is still a dusty mess. It's getting there.

Some updates since I have been a little headless-farm-avian as of late.

The missed projects ended up coming back onto my plate. In the case of one, the CD contacted the director who was MORE than generous is shifting things around in the schedule to allow me to do the show. This, is very exciting and cool.

In the other case, the CD called back and told me that the director et al would be willing to wait until I found out what was going on with Betrayed's future. This, is very exciting and cool. BUT, we got another, and a final, extnesion to the end of June, so I have a feeling this project will have to fall which will be disappointing for me as it is with a director I REALLY want to work with.

One door and another and all.

Today's show was the last for Jeremy Beck who plays the Soldier/RSO (or Jason/Randall as he was dubbed).

It does not get any easier.

I can't begin to express how thankful I am to have met and worked with this amazing actor who to this very performance managed to scare the crap out of me every time we had our interrogation scene. Truly one of the most congenial, giving, and hilarious actors I have met. Eric T. Miller (no link, no site.....get on that Eric) takes over for him tomorrow.

For now, I am off to unwind and get some work done. Which will entail my watching TV until all hours of the morning.

We've got to clean out the freezer...

2008-04-06T23:53:00.000-07:00

So the proverbial bee landed in bonnet and I decided to redo the site around the new headshots. This is never a good thing for me as I become highly anal about the coding and end up wanting to set fired to my hard drive because the coding goes wonky on me.

So forgive the site looking a little weird and the blog looking a little out of place until I work out all the kinks.

Bit by Bit...Part by Part....

2008-04-01T12:16:00.000-07:00

So the day has been fraught with good and bad news.

Betrayed has been extended to May 4 (somewhat old news) with another possible extension in the pipes. We also received a Lucille Lortel nomination for Best Play. And audiences are enjoying the show immensely and being moved while learning something new without being preached to.

Who could ask for anything more?

I still feel so lucky, honored, and blessed to get to do this show every night and bring these true stories to audiences who might be inspired to stand up and say or do something.

Now, for the icky stuff...

There is a lot about the biz I need to get used to, and one of them is the "bad problem, but a good one to have" mantra.

The show extension happened to conflict with two other projects I had been fortunate enough to book. And thus began the difficulty of trying to make everything work, and make everyone happy, and not annoy or piss anyone off. This....is not so easy when you have a conscience and set of ethics that kicks into a guilty overdrive when you can't make everything fall into place.

Hence, the good problem-bad problem thing. I wish I could do all three projects and make them work out, but the timing and scheduling don't seem to fall in line. I am thrilled with Betrayed doing so well and would never dump the show and run. And, yeah, I could stand behind the legalities of contracts and use that as a shield, but at the end of the day, as a person, I feel guilty for letting people down. Sure, I know everyone understands this is the nature of the business and people float in and out of jobs all the time. That does not necessarily make it any easier on me.

There is, of course, that latent fear of thinking no one will call you in again or cast you because you turned down a previous project. Maybe that is silly and maybe there is some merit to the fear. Thus the tricks and hurdles of show business that I need to just get over and deal with, I guess.

It still sucks...

I Keep Rollin' Along

2008-03-13T22:29:00.000-07:00

Last night we celebrated (as odd a choice of word as that is for the occasion) the final performance of Mike Doyle in the show. And tonight we officially ushered in Christopher Kromer.

And thus I got to experience something completely new (which this show seems to be heaping onto me in copious amounts). I have done enough shows to get used to the notion of a show ending and a cast departing. And while actors can sometimes be notorious for not keeping in touch, when we do another show together we just pick up where we left off.

However, continuing on in a show with castmates leaving hither and thither (yes, I went there) to put it plainly, SUCKS. Understand this has nothing to do with talent, but basic human relations. I imagine coming in as a replacement or taking over as an understudy must be the oddest feeling because you not only feel like you are crashing a party really late, but also that you don't know a damn person at the party and you decide to stick around anyway. There is aweird sense of loss that I have not felt before. I truly will miss his presence in the dressing room and on the stage, but am ravenously curious about the experience of working with someone new.

So here's to you Doyle - the only person to beat me at Scrabble (he emphasizes twice - I don't count the second time) and an incredible actor and human being who has helped me more than he will probably ever know. I miss you, man.

Shlooooooooooooooooooooooooonak!

That Not-So-Marvelous Face

2008-03-12T13:55:00.000-07:00

The joys of headshots.

I am sure I am not the only actor who finds it tremendously difficult and uncomfortable to sit in front of a camera for three hours to get "the" headshot to use across a myriad of genres and projects.

I particularly hate the process because I often feel like I should be in a bell tower hanging out with pigeons and gargoyles. I took my first "big boy" headshots last year and the experience was relatively painless. I felt like I looked like a tool in many of them.

I spent three hours outdoors this morning/afternoon fressing my hands and nose off (no doubt I will look like Rudolph in many of them). However, the photog was amazingly congenial and patient and definitley interested in getting the best shot for me. He showed me some of them every once in a while. I cringed every time I saw myself. Loved the composition, but thought I looked a fool. I wish I could just relax and let go and just DO IT. I started out like gangbusters but deflated as we went on. I could tell I was not giving him what he needed which just made me second guess everything.

I would rather sing for a panel of 6 Broadway cognescenti than take photos. But I need them. I need a set to help me transition into the next phase of wherever it is this crazy career is leading me.

I am trepidatiously looking forward to seeing what the photog weeds out as passable and hoping I can find at least two different shots I can use.

Show is still going well. Wished there was more marketing behind it and that all the intentions were fully realized, but such is the beast.

All I'm Askin' for....is Change

2008-03-03T20:28:00.001-08:00

Betrayed has been going really well as we continue to feel our legs and explore all the nitty gritty corners of the show. Audience reactions have been overwhelming and I have to say that I am not bored at all. I was worried about long runs and trying to keep it fresh, but the show speaks for itself in that it keeps me on my toes. It's not really a show you can be on autopilot for.

We have been officially extended to April 13 (tell your friends) with another extension possible after that. I am having so much fun that I will stick with the show for as long as it is open and for as long as I will be had.

This is possibly the most socially fulfilling show I have ever done. I have done shows that have given me personal satisfaction from a wanting-to-play-that-part angle, but this shows feeds that rhetorical part of my self. People love the show and are so incredibly moved by it. An Iraqi woman, whose father went through similar situations, stopped me in the lobby on the verge of tears and thanked for telling this story. She gave me a rose obviously given to her by her play date and was compelled to hug me. Two night ago I walked into the theatre after the show to talk to the SM and two women were sitting in the seats glossy-eyed unable to move. We spoke briefly and they could not believe how moved and angry they were. Some people can't believe that the play is completely truthful and accurate. Hell, we don't need the lens of fiction with some of the shit we have been charged with portraying every night.

I feel so lucky, and honored, and responsible to make sure the story is told every night and that every audience member DOES get angry or teary-eyed so someone does something. As a refugee myself who has fought for many years to get my citizenship (18 years later and it is finally happening in the next few months) I can understand the frustrations. I truly hope as many people come see the show if for nothing else but to be educated without being preached at and taught. At the heart of it, this is a play about people and relationships that happen to get entangled in politics.

On another note, I continue to pound the pavement with auditions, agent hunting, and CD inviting. I have gotten several bites and interested people (including an AMAZING meeting with a major film CD who could not have been more honest, generous and cordial). I am starting to slowly but surely get over the sting of the reality that I may very well not have a real place in musical theatre in NY. And even though that is what I came to NY to do, I am finding that I am falling in love all over again with plays (last one I did was Noises Off...8 years ago). I am also finding the spark I once had for TV and film stuff. To be honest....work is work and work begets work and I am not turning anything down. And if I have to achieve my goals by backdoors or through other avenues, then so be it. The only thing I fear is being lost in the brown actor shuffle. But I love that I am ethnically ambiguous enough that not many (if any) can peg where I come from. Of course....that can be to my detriment. But...meh...I just wanna work and meet people and grow and all that other fun stuff.

I say this now...knowing full well that after I go to my next EPA I will be fatalistic and kicking myself.

Life upon the wicked stage indeed...

Typing

2008-02-12T15:24:00.001-08:00

There is something about typing at an audition that I find both logically obvious and humanly evil.

Today was my third experience with typing. The first two times, I was typed in.

Not so much this time around.

Now the one part of me thinks typing makes sense. Why waste anyone's time and spend endless hours in a room listening to song after song if you go after the looks you need and pick from that pile. I get it. I agree with it.

The Rousseaian part of me finds it heinous. I am standing in a line - being looked over like a vintage lamp at a swap meet - thinking: This must be what it is like at a bunny ranch. And it feels worse when they look at you twice, whisper something, and then put you in the "no" pile. This, of course, sends an actor's mind reeling to all corners in translating what that must mean. What our imaginations conjure up as that whispered 3-second conversation is probably nowhere near the reality of what is being said.

But, I would rather be rejected on my looks than on my talent. I can't control the former, and can the latter - albeit to a degree.

But you don't feel too chipper when you ride down an elevator with the other no's and someone chimes in with: Well, this is an elevator full of fail.

And I am back to feeling like a non-eq, trying to keep my sense of humor and keeping in mind that this is just one of many and that the recent good stuff far outweighs today.

And then I return to the paranoia of needing to make sure the CDs, especially at this agency, like me and remember me positively (I get an inkling that they are not fans of me at all - could be self-layered paranoia, but could also be reality).

My second audition was cancelled two hours before my time and under ominous tones. An inquiry I made went unanswered, which of course made me go right to the most negatuve imagined reason instead of what could simply have been a lack of time and not some pre-conceived judgement about me (especially when I have never met this group of people ever).

And people wonder why actors are in therapy and medicated.

Once I mentally slap myself and kick my psychological super ego into drive, I'll get over it and be back in the same place of just pushing forward and only being able to do what I can and be who I am.

Putting it Together

2008-02-07T14:29:00.000-08:00

Last night will forever be one that I neither forget in its magnitude nor its surreality.

Opening night went well, give or take two moments when my tongue became unhitched from my mouth, forming some Seussian sentences. The excitement and energy in the air was completley palpable and thick.

The opening night party was nothing less than incredible. Being ushered in and having photographers ocularlly blugeoning me as I stood there like a doofus was anxiety inducing - as is evidenced in some of the pictures where I am on my own looking like I either won the lottery or won a free deportation to Gitmo. Note to self: learn to stand composed, focus, and smile warmly.

I had an amazing time talking to friends, audience members, castmates, and celebrities who I never thought in a million years I would ever have the chance to say "hello" to let alone have a protracted conversation with. I found myself thinking over and over again: What is going on?? Things like this do not happen to people like me.

I feel so completley honored, blessed, challenged, and terrified by the whole thing and can't wait to see what each new day brings. My only hope is that it continues pushing forward.

Thankfully, all the reviews have been positive or glowing with only one or two criticisms (non-venomous). If you have the time and care, I will post a set of links below.

I am also going to update some pages with all new pictures and whatnot.

Until them, I am just going to continue slapping myself.

Reviews and such:

* Opening Night Pics -Note the missing "e" from my last name and the completely dazed look.
* Playbill: Opening Night Announcement
* New York Times - Charles Isherwood // "Seduced and Abandoned by Promises of Freedom"
* New York Post - Frank Scheck // "Iraqis Believed but we 'Betrayed'"
* Variety - Sam Thielman // "Betrayed"
* Daily News - Joe Dziemianowicz // "'Betrayed' Features 3 Casualties of Hope in Iraq
* Herald Tribune - The Associated Press // "'Betrayed' looks at Iraqis who work for the Americans in Baghdad"
* Newsday - Linda Winer // "'Betrayed' at Culture Project"
* Theatermania - Dan Bacalzo // "Betrayed"
* Backstage - David A. Rosenberg // "Betrayed"
* Bloomberg.com - John Simon // "Packer's Splendid First Play Honors Abandoned Iraqis"
* NYTheatre.com - Loren Noveck // "Betrayed"
* New York Public Radio - Amy Eddings // "'Betrayed' a New Play at the Culture * * Project Looks at the U.S. in Iraq"
* The New York Observer - Doree Shafrir // "Green Zone in SoHo? New Yorker’s Mr. Packer Brings Baghdad to Mercer Street"

One of these days I'll be one of those people...

2008-02-03T15:25:00.000-08:00

Previews for Betrayed are going amazingly well. I have never worked so hard and reaped so many personal rewards in the guise of doing something good socially and culturally.

I celebrated my one year move-to-NY anniversary yesterday quietly. And what better way to start a new year than to be completely honored by being in the NY Times for the show:

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/02/03/theater/03filk.html?ref=theater

I hope everyone I know sees the show because it is an important one. Aside from supporting the actors and theatre, I really do think it is important that people become aware of the problem presented in the show and do something to help make a change.

And now I step off the soap box and shift my focus to the Superbowl.

Losing Track of Time

2008-01-24T22:39:00.000-08:00

Things have been going quite well despite my ominous silence. Although, I would not really call it ominous.

Rehearsals for Betrayed have been going well. Gruleing, exhausting, frustrating. A lot of self-reflective self-deprecating and beating of my actor self. A lot of learning and growing and finding my play feet again.

The show is amazing, I feel, despite my obvious bias. I think the piece is timely, political without being preachy, and is an amazing human story. I encourage everyone to please come see the show. I would appreciate the support, of course, but this is a story that people need to hear.

I was surprised by two different friends who stumbled across info about the show. One was on Broadwayworld.com with our first set of cast pictures. Notice the stern looks that bespeak much violence should the price be right.

This was followed by an excited phone call from a friend in Panama City who happened to be listening to Talk of the Nation and heard George Packer, our playwright, discussing the piece and the social themes.

This is all very surreal. I feel extremely lucky and blessed to be working with ridiculously talented actors and an amazing director and playwright. I could not ask for a better Off-Broadway debut experience - blood, sweat, tears and all.

Just One Step

2007-12-08T17:20:00.000-08:00

I know...I should be severely beaten for letting the blog go to sleep, but life on the TheatreWorks road has been long, exhausting, time consuming, and rewarding.

I can see the end of the road with the last show approaching this Wednesday. I will wait until then to post my after thoughts on the whole experience (and that sounds ominous but reads exactly as written with no entendre).

However, I do have a spot of good news to announce. This week has been the craziest week I have had in NY so far (including the week I went on three auditions a day like a mad man).

So late last week I got an e-mail from a composer I worked with in A New Brain (Tim Rosser). He played in the pit for the show and I later saw and loved his material at the end-of-year BMI performance about 6 months ago. So I was thrilled when he asked me to come in sing a song for the project he is working for this year.

The trick was finding a way to get from York, PA (the then show location) to New York for the performance and then back again for the next day's show. Easy. Done. Rent a car.

Thank god for the last two weeks being local because I was around to meet him for a rehearsal. Loved the song and just love his music in general.

I got a bonus when a fellow actress with whom I shot The Stoop, and who works as a casting director part-time, called me about a great opportunity for The Culture Project. Serendipitously, the audition was on the same day as the BMI bit. Thank you, oh gods of the stage...

So the week went as follows:

1) Woke up early Tuesday morning to pick up the rental car at which point I was told I could not rent the car because I did not have a credit card not attached to a bank account. Who the hell does that? They would not even let me pay with cash. Huh??? Some clever planning netted me a back up plan which worked well.

2) Got to NY at 1:54. Got home at 2:02. Got situated, dressed and ready to go by 2:32. Hit my audition at 3:15 with 15 minutes to spare. Met the director, did my sides, got some direction, did em' again, and off I went.

3) Headed uptown to rehearse at 4:30. Learned a new section. Lost an old section. Went over the lines before the song. Went to the BMI space by 5:30. Did it. Left to head back home to then head back to York.

4) Checked a missed call message and the CD wanted me to come in and meet with the writer because the director loved me (props to ye stage deities again). But...too much time had passed. After some calling backs and some schedule finagling, I got something set for the following day when I would be back in the city.

5) Went home, re-packed and headed back to York.

The callback got rescheduled the followin day to the day after, which gave me a day to breathe and look over the sides a little more. Thursday, I went to the callback, met with the writer George Packer, whose work I love. Audition felt odd and off and I could not find myself. I do much better at cold auditions than when I have time to mull over the sides and overthink them (a product of my over-education). Found out about a rehearsal for a demo song for a composer friend of mine, Jeffrey Campos, whose music I also love. So headed over there after the callback and sang through the material.

Missed another call...but this time...it was fan-friggin-tastic news. I booked the show!!!

The show is called Betrayed and will run after the first of the year. It is the first full-length play I am doing since arriving in NY in February (hard to believe it has still been less than a year) and the first play in a long time. I love the piece it is based on, I love the issues, I love the voice, the non-preachy message. I am just looking forward to kicking the shit out of the material and working with the amazing directing staff.

There is some other great stuff attached with the project but nothing I can definitively talk about. Sufficed to say that if the fates are kind, the project could explode into something bigger.

So, I am thankful, to say the least, for this next job (God, I hate calling them that) and looking forward to the next step I will take on this path.

Sidenote: How proud am I of a high school friend, David Blue, for finally being recognized and landing a recurring role on Ugly Betty as Cliff? Nearly fell off my chair when I saw him on TV, but just beamed afterwards.

And now to catch up on some reality TV and sleep.

Home

2007-11-17T20:34:00.001-08:00

My attempts at trying to maintain the blog on the road was a laughable plan. I was either unmotivated due to exhaustion or performing/travelling/eating. Leg #1 is done and we have a week off (which I will enjoy immensely) followed by leg #2 which is mostly local shows leaving plenty of time to go on auditions (plans of mice and men being what they are).

I enjoyed a 5-hour unpacking and cleaning frenzy marvelling at how much more I brought back than I left with.

The shows went really well, each filled with their own moments of backstage humor and onstage goofs. I still stand by my previous post's mention about the politics of social negotation within cast tensions.

I completely marvelled and revelled in experiencing my first fall in several states. I cannot adequately describe the colors and I don't think that any fabric or crayon could ever accurately capture the colors. I think death is nature is the only amazingly beautiful death to behold and experience. Coming from two different continental homes, both of which shared two basic seasons - hot and cold - I was like a kid in a candy store constantly taking picture of trees on fire with color.

I also loved getting to see other parts of the country, and even at its worst moments it was incredible as I dealt with racial profiling in small and large towns spoke volumes. I shudder to think what an actor with a less ambiguous ethnicity would face.

I am glad to back although I felt some anxiety as I drove of the GW bridge wondering if I could re-adjust.

I can. I did. Quite easily.

Now I am looking forward to just chilling, auditioning, and looking for the next acting job.

Left My Troubles All Behind Me

2007-10-22T16:30:00.000-07:00

So touring...is rather quite fun. Completely exhausting, but fulfilling. Except, for some reason, I am sick again and it is pretty bad. No wild symptoms - all seems to be internal.

Seeing different parts of the country, both affluent and poor, has been, and continues to be, amazing. Performing for kids who would otherwise never see anything theatrical is an amazing feeling (despite my aversion to some kids).

Seeing leaves change their color for the first time in my life, set against the mountainous backdrop of North Carolina, was incredible. I am such a nature nut. We have stayed in some interesting hotels (meaning seedy, but intriguing) and are being treated to a two-day stay at a Holiday Inn Express in Greenville, South Carolina.

I am taking pictures and flagging a map (http://www.flagr.com/maps/3098) so feel free to check out all the weirdness and beauty.

Show is going well and I find that I am not getting sick of doing the same thing or doing it twice a day. The show is fun, well-written , and cleverly directed so the experience is positive.

Touring does teach you a valuable lesson in human interaction and personality negotiation. I find it best to shut up, smile, listen and stay positive. Why ruin an experience like this.

That being said, I am looking forward to getting back into the city only so I can get started auditioning again and getting more work.

I Am On My Way

2007-10-10T08:26:00.000-07:00

So the A New Generation of Song has come and gone. Things went ok, but could have been much better. I got struck with some awful cold virus that has just now run its course. It is the first time I have been sick since coming to NY and this mutated version would NOT leave my body. I managed to get to a comfortable vocal place for the performances but it was a struggle. I was not pleased with how my stuff went (well, my solos to be exact), but it could have been a lot worse.

I am not finishing up rehearsals for Henry & Mudge which heads out next week. I lucked out with a tour schedule that is really short and really loose with enough days off to be able to survey the lands. Of course, we are going to some pretty small towns where I am sure I will be great lynching material. You know, one of them fer'ners. We have Thanksgiving week off and then the rest of the schedule involves local shows which means I get to sleep in my bed.

After that, time to buckle down and get representation which I THINK I might have and then get myself submitted to as much as I can. Totally open to whatever work comes my way, but as I keep getting told that I am more easily castable in TV/Film (thanks to the surplus of "brown" roles) I have a feeling I will be going to many of those auditions. Whatever's clever, I say.

I am still dedicated to breaking this strange white barrier when it comes to theatre. While shows usually tout blind casting, what appears onstage is generally a smattering of ethnic actors that just looks like a quota fulfillment. I know that sounds awful, but that is what I see. I am no fool. I know I would not fit into a musical like The Music Man unless the production was directed completely differently, but there are a lot of musicals where my ethnicity and color would not really make a difference. Still, I walk into a room and sometimes feel immediately dismissed. It's the "what do we do with him" reaction which the voice teach warned me about. In a way, I like that because I can't be pigeon-holed, but if can't be placed in a category then I have a much harder chance of being able to say "HEY! I fit in THAT track. USE ME!"

I hear the strains of sopranos next door as auditions go on for Camelot and I think to myself....yeah...would never get into that show. But to be honest, I have pretty much let go of trying to control anything. Ima just hang onto the beast and let it drag me. I am just concerned with getting out and being seen and doing the best I can to land a job.

Easy Come, Easy Go

2007-09-14T14:42:00.000-07:00

I am now done to one NYMF show after a phone call regarding the conflicts between my H&M rehearsals and matinée performances of Maccabeat! Fortunately, it was only three rehearsals into the process, but it sucks because I generally liked the show and the people and was just starting to get to know everyone. I need to get my Equity training wheels off very quickly before I start screwing myself into a very deep pit.

I got the list of songs planned for A New Generation of Song...and they are incredible. All the songs in the show are great, in my opinion and am really looking forward to performing the material and having people come see it.

I am stepping up my hunt for representation - it's the one big-little thing I need to push me over a certain line and keep my forward (or up) momentum. Am doing some intern work with a boutique management company which will really help me get the other side of the business, which I find fascinating outside of being an actor. This connection is thanks to the fabulous Loni Ackerman (a faboo 80s Broadway Diva) who I shot The Stoop with. Not only is she incredibly talent, but also gracious and kind. I am still floored that I met her and get to talk to her.

I know, I sound like a gushing sycophant. LOL. It would be like meeting Judy Kuhn and either passing out in front of here or barfing all over her shoes. They don't make em like they used to. There is more to it all then being a superbelter.

And so the work continues. Bring on the movies, TV and shows. I am ready for 'em.